Like everyone else whom I love but doesn’t love me back, engineering hurts me more for not loving me back than it should. I love engineering, i love it so much.
I am certain that this is the path that I want. I want to become an engineer – I am more than willing to commit to all the maths and physics as I did in high school. I don’t see those subjects as a problem to me unlike others, and I’m even more motivated because they are my cup of tea.
Also, machines are my thing. I’ve always been curious on how they work and how to design them; it got myself thinking what I could do if I go for engineering.
But regardless, so far, my situation as a mechanical engineering student is getting worse. I’m on my third year in my course now and it’s been terrible. It feels impossible for me to get the good grades despite all the efforts I give. I get to study long hours and I submit my requirements with the best I could give. Some of my professors grade me unfairly; others terrorize me. I feel being beaten every time I try to stand up.
With all that is happening after my first semester, I’ve always wanted to give up. It’s obviously a relationship I cannot maintain anymore because no matter how hard I try to give my best, I don’t feel any reciprocation that my efforts are being valued. But I know deep inside I’m not the kind who gives up this easily especially if I really want to lead this kind of life.
I love engineering but I feel engineering doesn’t love me. How does engineering get to love me back? Like many mysteries there are, I don’t know the answer to that. But I’ve been holding on to my ambition in becoming an engineer, just with a loose grip.
If there’s anything that I believe about love, it’s this: they say that if you love something, you set if free. That’s not true. If you love something, you fight for it – and I will fight for engineering because that’s my destiny